Just breathe!

I just need to relax.

I've been on an odd wavelength since I finished reading Orwell's 1984. It's shocking how much a good book can affect someone.

School is getting a little stressful, especially since some of my grades are hovering around a C and I really need to pull it together to move them up. I've been taking Spanish the semester and it's actually pretty tough. Memorizing all the vocabulary and forming sentences is the hardest part, but my professor is pretty cool. He's an sarcastic old hispanic guy from New Orleans and he calls people out; it's pretty funny.

This semester has pretty much been a cake walk for the most part. I'm going to have to buckle down in all my classes since its around the end of the semester. If I can't cut it on an easy semester, I sure as hell wouldn't cut it next semester.

I'll be taking classes in ALL my academic weaknesses: Algebra, Spanish II, and Biology.

On a lighter note, I've been working on a memoir. It's not particularly practical literature considering that memoir is the hardest to get people interested in (I think), but its coming along. I've come to realize that I've got a barrier in writing that I need to break: I can only write when I've got a deadline.

This is a real problem considering that I won't always have deadlines to keep me motivated. When I graduate, I will have to be completely self-motivated. Sometimes I wish someone would hold a gun to my head or tell me I have cancer so that I'd be forced into a creative frenzy.

I finally pulled myself from this rut that I was struggling in for the past few weeks. I grew a beard, and coincidentally, I felt like shit. I'm not sure if having a face full of itchy, multi-colored, hair had anything to do with it, but it certainly made me feel dirty and ugly. So in hindsight, yeah, it probably did.

Gotta look good to feel good right?

Anyway, workin on this new thing: keeping myself going.